The Shattered Monocle

Vintage Tie

Wed, 10 Jun 2009 00:08:00 -0400

Dyna Moe asked for pictures of vintage ties on her Twitter feed. Because I ingested a foul mix of Velveeta, Dimetap and Diet Coke over the course of this evening, I thought instead of going to bed, I’d try to take a couple of snaps of a vintage Saks 5th Ave tie. Hooray for insomnia and terrible cameraphones!

"America has secretly created a monster while no one was looking, and now everyone wants to watch as..."

Wed, 27 May 2009 17:40:49 -0400

“America has secretly created a monster while no one was looking, and now everyone wants to watch as that monster rips itself to shreds. We did it, you guys. Pop champagne.”

- Gabe Delahaye at Videogum

I found out about Black Joe Lewis and The Honeybears just before...

Tue, 12 May 2009 12:07:46 -0400

I found out about Black Joe Lewis and The Honeybears just before I left for Atlantic City on Saturday and I’ve now listened to their full-length about 6-7 times straight through. Howlin’ vocals coupled with a backing band that sounds like something straight off of a 1960’s Stax record. In fact, the opening of “Gunpowder” is reminiscent of the Stax single “Soul Finger” by The Bar-Kays.

Solid, punchy, backbone slippin’ Southern soul, ya can’t beat it.

Giant Bed Jumping

Thu, 07 May 2009 16:00:13 -0400

When I work myself into a mood and start complaining to somone about how expensive/dirty/expensive/loud/expensive/hot/expensive New York City is, the common response — followed by an eyeroll and a frantic search for a way to excuse themselves — is, “Why don’t you move?” The answer: New York is the best delivery system of completely random things.

Example: My co-worker Janet and I managed to carve 10 minutes out of our day to go to Bryant Park and jump on 30 double mattresses for what was billed as “The World’s Biggest Bed Jump.”

Janet has gone on record stating that one of her pet peeves is pictures of people jumping, which make this picture that much better. (Side note: that guy in the PJ’s in the background looks eerily like Todd Barry, but not as easy on the eyes.)

A graceful landing. (Also, I look like a giant compared to the folks behind me.)

Based on the scale of the bed, Janet is roughly the size of one NYC area bedbug.

I have to remember the little things like jumping on a giant bed the next time I’m complaining about the lack of affordable places to eat lunch in midtown.

Fashion Forward

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 15:08:17 -0400

I love when a TV show or movie uses a pop cultural touchstone that’s so obscure, you may only get the reference until way after you initially watched it. It gives you a little reward for paying attention.

For example, a couple of weeks ago, South Park had an episode that satirized Kanye West. At one point, Kanye’s entourage shows up, dressed in what I’m assuming passes for “fashion” somewhere, but skews dangerously close to “costumes”.

Little did I know that the outfits Kanye’s friends were wearing on South Park were based on a real life picture:

(top picture via South Park Studios, bottom picture via Hey Okay)

Incredible! I’m saddened that they guy in the electric blue bubble vest didn’t make the cut. However, if the decision was down to either him or Mr. Parliament-Funkadelic-by-way-of-Motley-Crue, then the right cut was made.

Smelcome

Tue, 21 Apr 2009 16:52:45 -0400

I must have made some big karmic faux-pas recently, as I feel like I’m a pinata and this week has been the greedy fat kid holding the stick. (Plus, no new LOST tomorrow night. FML.)

In these situations, I turn to the Internet for a little schadenfreude, which brings me to this clip that I’ve watched over and over today (via failblog.org).

This clip. Ah, this clip. To pick out my favorite moment would be like picking out a favorite child. However, like any parent will do when their kids are not around, I’ll pick one anyway. It’s the moment where the host’s weed-addled brain sacrifices its last remaining cell to give its owner one perfect moment of clarity. His expression upon this awakening makes my week thus far, look blessed by comparison.

To the baked, tongue-tied, corn-rowed, ska-punk loving, English skater d-bag out there somewhere, thanks for making me feel better.

You know that scene...

Tue, 14 Apr 2009 12:54:00 -0400

…in Empire Strikes Back, where Vader is just about to capture the Millennium Falcon after it leaves Cloud City, but Artoo fixes the hyperdrive, it speeds away and Vader stares out the window where the Falcon used to be, then looks away, then looks back in disbelief?

That was me watching the highlights of Nick Swisher pitching for the Yankees last night.

Skittles Vodka Tutorial | Mix That Drink

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 18:19:37 -0500

Skittles Vodka Tutorial | Mix That Drink

"AVC: Did she eventually warm up? BC: She knew right from the start that I was trying to get in her..."

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 11:10:06 -0500

“

AVC: Did she eventually warm up?

BC: She knew right from the start that I was trying to get in her pants.

AVC: How long did she hold out?

BC: [Holds phone away from mouth.] How long did it take before we got married? [Mumbling.] A year later, we were married.

”

- Bruce Campbell | Film | A.V. Club

Robin Hood's "Oo De Lally," Translated Into 13 Languages - Waxy.org

Tue, 10 Feb 2009 12:02:31 -0500

Robin Hood's "Oo De Lally," Translated Into 13 Languages - Waxy.org

Social Music: Top 5 Sites to Build a Playlist

Mon, 09 Feb 2009 15:29:42 -0500

Social Music: Top 5 Sites to Build a Playlist:

mashable:

The Social Music series is supported by BLive Share, a platform for online music sharing and host of the Groove Armada mini album.

Ah, the perfect playlist. In the quest to find a…

“Skeletor” by Alex Leighton, Acrylic on Canvas (Buy...

Mon, 09 Feb 2009 15:25:13 -0500

“Skeletor” by Alex Leighton, Acrylic on Canvas (Buy it here)

While you’re at it, buy me Stratos.

The first season alone clocks in at a solid 4:00

Mon, 09 Feb 2009 11:59:48 -0500

The first season alone clocks in at a solid 4:00

Topless Robot - Evil Flying Jesus Stars in the Real Worst Cartoon Ever

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 17:06:43 -0500

Topless Robot - Evil Flying Jesus Stars in the Real Worst Cartoon Ever

“Famous” Mugs (At Least This Week) - February 6,...

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 16:52:52 -0500

“Famous” Mugs (At Least This Week) - February 6, 2009

Peter Sellers’ Clousseau > Steve Martin’s...

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 10:20:03 -0500

Peter Sellers’ Clousseau > Steve Martin’s Clousseau

OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies DVD Rental, Rent OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies Today at Netflix

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 18:15:58 -0500

OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies DVD Rental, Rent OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies Today at Netflix

Load-Bearing Poster

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 14:50:40 -0500

Load-Bearing Poster

The Keene Act & YOU (1977) (via thenewfrontiersman)

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 13:59:50 -0500

The Keene Act & YOU (1977) (via thenewfrontiersman)

"DENVER—After receiving the device intended to alert him when his family’s table at the..."

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 10:54:46 -0500

“DENVER—After receiving the device intended to alert him when his family’s table at the Cheesecake Factory was ready, local father Timothy Reardon traversed the parking lots of adjacent businesses with the pager Tuesday to determine its range. “I’ll bet I can get all the way behind the Barnes & Noble, no problem,” said Reardon, who has performed similar experiments with cordless telephones. “I don’t want to take it too close to the Best Buy, though, because all that electronic stuff in there might screw it up.” At press time, Reardon’s wife and children were finishing their appetizers while Reardon was still trying to find a way to get off the roof of an Old Navy a quarter of a mile away.”

- Dad Tests Limits Of Cheesecake Factory Vibrating Pager | The Onion - America’s Finest News Source